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Pregnancy & Newborn

Third-Trimester Behaviour: Your Baby Is Already Communicating

From the third trimester through your baby's first three months, your newborn's behaviour and emotions are driven by biology, not personality — understanding the patterns makes those early weeks far less frightening and far more connected.

By Whimsical Pris 18 min read
Third-Trimester Behaviour: Your Baby Is Already Communicating
In this article

Imagine being handed the world's most complex piece of technology with no manual, no error codes, and a battery that drains every 90 minutes. That's roughly what the first three months of parenthood feel like. According to the World Health Organization, approximately 140 million babies are born each year — and almost every one of their parents spends those early weeks wondering, "Is this normal?"

The good news: most of what looks alarming is completely typical. The better news: your baby has been practising emotional communication since before birth, and you are already wired to respond.

In this guide you'll understand:

How your baby's emotional and behavioural development begins in the womb
The six newborn behavioural states and what each one is asking of you
Why developmental leaps cause fussiness — and how to survive them
How your own emotions shape your baby's stress-response system
Red flags that genuinely warrant a call to your paediatrician


1. Third-Trimester Behaviour: Your Baby Is Already Communicating

Long before the birth certificate is signed, your baby is practising the building blocks of emotional life. From around 28 weeks, the foetal brain produces distinct sleep–wake cycles, and by 32–34 weeks most babies show consistent patterns of movement, startle responses, and even facial expressions that researchers have linked to later emotional temperament.

A landmark 2013 study published in PLOS ONE by researchers at Durham and Lancaster Universities used 4D ultrasound to show that foetuses as young as 32 weeks display "laughter-face" expressions, suggesting emotional muscle memory begins well before birth.

What Normal Third-Trimester Movement Looks Like

- 10 kicks in 2 hours is the commonly used benchmark recommended by the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) for kick counting after 28 weeks. - Movement tends to peak in the evening when your blood sugar is steady and you're resting. - Hiccups (rhythmic, repetitive jolts) are a sign of diaphragm maturation — entirely normal. - A sudden decrease in movement — not just a quiet spell — is worth a same-day call to your midwife or OB.

Start a simple kick-count log at 28 weeks
Note the time of day your baby is most active — that pattern often continues after birth
Share the log with your provider at your next appointment

2. The Six Behavioural States: Learning Your Newborn's Language

Every newborn cycles through six distinct behavioural states, first described by developmental paediatrician T. Berry Brazelton, MD, whose Neonatal Behavioral Assessment Scale (NBAS) became the gold standard for newborn evaluation. Understanding these states is the single fastest way to feel less helpless in those first weeks.

The Six States at a Glance

Behavioural StateWhat You'll SeeWhat Baby NeedsRecommended ResourceApprox. Duration (newborn)
Deep SleepStill, eyes closed, no movementUndisturbed restNBO System Handbook20–40 min cycles
Light/Active SleepFluttering eyelids, small twitches, brief soundsDon't rush to pick up — waitMonth-by-Month Baby BookVariable
DrowsyHeavy lids, slow blinking, mild fussingGentle stimulation or feedMayo Clinic Baby GuideTransitional
Quiet AlertWide eyes, still body, focused gazeTalk, sing, make eye contactYour Baby Is Speaking to You2–3 min (newborn)
Active AlertFussing, increased movement, sensitive to stimuliReduce stimulation, check hunger/discomfortThe Wonder WeeksEscalating
CryingFull cry, red face, arched backImmediate comfort responseThe Montessori BabyUntil need is met


3. Crying as Communication: Decoding What Your Baby Is Telling You

Crying is your newborn's only fully developed communication tool, and it is designed by evolution to be impossible to ignore. The average newborn cries 2–3 hours per day in the first six weeks, according to data reviewed by the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). That number peaks around weeks 6–8 and then — reliably — begins to drop.

Crying is not manipulation. In the first months of life, it is the primary language of need.

American Academy of Pediatrics, *Caring for Your Baby and Young Child*, 7th Edition (2019)

Common Cry Patterns and Their Meaning

- Hunger cry: Rhythmic, repetitive, builds gradually. Often accompanied by rooting and hand-to-mouth movements. - Pain cry: Sudden, high-pitched, followed by a breath-holding pause then another burst. - Overstimulation cry: Whiny, escalating, often after a busy outing or lots of visitors. - Tired cry: Fussy, intermittent, often with eye-rubbing and gaze aversion.

Run through the basics first: hunger, nappy, temperature, wind
If all basics are met, try reducing stimulation before adding more soothing
If crying is inconsolable for more than 3 hours/day, 3+ days/week — talk to your paediatrician (this meets the clinical definition of colic)

4. Developmental Leaps: Why Your "Good" Baby Suddenly Isn't

Around weeks 4–5, many parents report their previously settled newborn becoming clingy, feeding constantly, and sleeping poorly. This is not a regression — it is a leap. The Wonder Weeks framework, developed by Dutch researchers Frans Plooij, PhD, and Hetty van de Rijt, PhD, identifies the first major neurological leap at approximately 5 weeks (adjusted from due date).

During a leap, your baby's brain is reorganising at a cellular level. Sensory processing becomes temporarily overwhelming, which drives the "three Cs": Clinginess, Crankiness, and Crying.

Surviving the First Leap (Weeks 4–5)

Expect the leap to last 1–2 weeks
Increase skin-to-skin contact — it regulates cortisol in both of you
Cluster feeding during this period is normal and helps maintain milk supply
Don't introduce major sleep changes during a leap; wait for the calmer window after


5. Co-Regulation: How Your Emotions Shape Your Baby's Brain

Here is the piece of science that changes everything: your baby cannot self-regulate their emotions in the first months of life. Their prefrontal cortex — the brain's calm-down centre — is structurally immature. They borrow your nervous system to regulate theirs. This process is called co-regulation, and it is one of the most replicated findings in developmental neuroscience.

Sensitive, responsive caregiving in the first year is the single strongest predictor of secure attachment and long-term emotional health.

Centre on the Developing Child, Harvard University (2016)

The Harvard Center on the Developing Child describes this as "serve and return" interaction — your baby sends a signal (a cry, a gaze, a sound), you respond, and that back-and-forth exchange literally builds neural connections.

What Co-Regulation Looks Like in Practice

- Slow your own breathing before picking up a distressed baby — your heart rate variability is contagious. - Narrate your actions in a calm voice: "I've got you, I'm here, let's figure this out together." - Skin-to-skin contact (kangaroo care) reduces cortisol in newborns and is endorsed by both the WHO and UNICEF for term and preterm infants.

You don't need to be perfectly calm — you need to be calmer than the baby
Parental anxiety is normal; acknowledging it is the first step to managing it
Both parents and non-birthing partners can co-regulate just as effectively

6. Postpartum Emotions and the Parent–Baby Bond

Approximately 1 in 5 mothers and 1 in 10 fathers experience postpartum depression or anxiety, according to the Royal College of Psychiatrists. This is not weakness — it is a neurobiological event driven by hormonal shifts, sleep deprivation, and the seismic identity change of becoming a parent.

What matters here is the intersection: your emotional state directly affects your baby's behavioural development. Untreated postpartum depression is associated with disrupted attachment, increased infant cortisol, and delayed language development (Murray & Cooper, Postpartum Depression and Child Development, 1997).

Signs That Warrant Professional Support

Persistent sadness or emptiness beyond two weeks postpartum
Intrusive thoughts about harming yourself or the baby
Feeling detached from your baby or unable to respond to their cues
Anxiety so severe it interferes with eating, sleeping, or caring for your baby


7. Red Flags vs. Normal Variation: When to Call Your Paediatrician

Most newborn behaviour that worries parents is normal variation. But some patterns genuinely need clinical attention. Knowing the difference saves you from both unnecessary panic and delayed intervention.

By 1 Month — Contact Your Doctor If:

Baby does not startle to loud sounds
Eyes do not briefly focus on your face during quiet alert state
No periods of quiet alertness at all — baby is either sleeping or crying constantly
Feeding is consistently taking more than 40 minutes per session (possible tongue-tie or latch issue)

By 2–3 Months — Contact Your Doctor If:

No social smile by 8 weeks (adjusted for prematurity)
Does not follow a slowly moving object with eyes
Does not respond to familiar voices
Limbs feel very stiff or very floppy compared to typical tone
Persistent high-pitched cry unlike their normal cry

Expert Insights




These first three months are not a test you can fail. They are a conversation you are learning to have — one cry, one gaze, one quiet alert moment at a time. Every time you respond to your baby's signal, even imperfectly, you are building the neural architecture that will underpin their emotional life for decades.

The most important thing you can give your newborn is not a perfect environment — it is a present, responsive you.

If this guide helped, save it for the hard evenings, share it with your co-parent, and bookmark the red-flag section for your next well-baby visit. You've got this.


Sources & References

  1. American Academy of Pediatrics. Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5, 7th Edition. 2019. aap.org
  2. American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. "Decreased Fetal Movement." ACOG FAQ, 2020. acog.org
  3. Centre on the Developing Child, Harvard University. "Serve and Return Interaction." 2016. developingchild.harvard.edu
  4. Reissland, N., Francis, B., & Mason, J. "Can Healthy Fetuses Show Facial Expressions of 'Pain' or 'Distress'?" PLOS ONE, 2013. doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0065530
  5. Royal College of Psychiatrists. "Postnatal Depression." 2021. rcpsych.ac.uk
  6. World Health Organization & UNICEF. "Kangaroo Mother Care: A Practical Guide." WHO, 2003. who.int
  7. Murray, L., & Cooper, P.J. (Eds.). Postpartum Depression and Child Development. Guilford Press, 1997.
  8. Plooij, F.X., & van de Rijt, H. The Wonder Weeks: A Stress-Free Guide to Your Baby's Behavior. Kiddy World Publishing, 2019.
  9. Brazelton, T.B., & Nugent, J.K. Neonatal Behavioral Assessment Scale, 4th Edition. Mac Keith Press, 2011.
  10. Wolke, D., et al. "Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis: Fussing and Crying Durations and Prevalence of Colic in Infants." Journal of Pediatrics, 2017. BMJ Open meta-analysis referenced: doi.org/10.1136/bmjopen-2017-015418

Frequently Asked Questions

Is it normal for my newborn to smile before 6 weeks?
Early smiles in the first 2–4 weeks are almost always reflexive — triggered by gas or random nerve firing during sleep, not by social recognition. A true "social smile" — one that appears in response to your face or voice — typically emerges between 6 and 8 weeks. If you're not seeing any social smile by 10 weeks, mention it to your paediatrician.
Why does my baby cry more in the evening?
Evening fussiness (sometimes called the "witching hour") peaks around 6 weeks and is thought to be caused by a combination of accumulated sensory stimulation throughout the day, a natural dip in maternal milk supply in the late afternoon, and an immature circadian rhythm. It is not a sign that you're doing anything wrong. Skin-to-skin, motion, and white noise are the most evidence-supported tools for this period.
Can my newborn feel my stress?
Yes — through a process called co-regulation, your baby's stress-response system is directly influenced by yours. Elevated maternal cortisol is transmitted through touch, voice tone, and even breast milk. This doesn't mean you must be perfectly calm; it means that actively managing your own nervous system (slow breathing, grounding techniques) is genuinely useful for your baby, not just for you.
When should my baby start making eye contact?
Most newborns can briefly fix their gaze on a face held 20–30 cm away from birth. Consistent, meaningful eye contact develops over the first 6–8 weeks. If your baby is consistently avoiding eye contact or not tracking your face by 2 months, flag it at your next well-baby visit.
Is the Wonder Weeks app scientifically accurate?
The Wonder Weeks framework is based on the research of Frans Plooij, PhD, and Hetty van de Rijt, PhD, published in peer-reviewed journals. The core finding — that there are predictable periods of neurological reorganisation in infancy — is well-supported. The specific timing of some leaps has been debated in the literature, and the app should be used as a guide rather than a precise prediction tool. The book The Wonder Weeks provides more nuance than the app alone.
How do I know if my baby has colic?
The clinical definition of colic (Wessel's "Rule of Three") is crying for more than 3 hours per day, more than 3 days per week, for more than 3 weeks in an otherwise healthy, well-fed baby. It affects approximately 10–40% of infants globally, according to a 2017 meta-analysis in the journal BMJ Open. Colic typically resolves by 3–4 months. If you're concerned, see your paediatrician to rule out underlying causes such as reflux or allergy.
Do I need to worry about spoiling my newborn by responding too quickly?
No. The concept of "spoiling" does not apply to babies under 6 months. Developmental research consistently shows that prompt, sensitive responses to infant cues build — rather than undermine — independence later in childhood. The secure attachment formed through responsive caregiving is the foundation from which toddlers and children confidently explore the world.

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